The Great Mystery of Why My Husband is Still Alive

You hear a lot about how opposites attract, don’t you? Democrat marries Republican . . . only to implode. Yankees fan marries, shudder, Red Sox fan only to . . . well, you know.

So here it is. Where I kick all y’all’s ass. I’ve been married 10 1/2 years and we are are:

1. A Yankee and a Reb. Yeah, I was born and raised in New York. He was born in the deep, deep, deep South and raised in spots beneath the Mason Dixon Land. We should be mortal enemies. But we’ve bumped pelvises enough to make a wee one. Go figure.

2. An iPhone and a Droid. This is opposites 2011 style, and we are living it up. He calls his a Pop Tart because it’s just so sweet (or you know, it may have something to do with the size and shape, but I find it more fun to demean it with “awww, that’s sweeeeeeet). I just say, “Soo, guess what I did with my IPHONE today.” It works. We haven’t killed each other, just blinded one another with competing flashlight apps.

3. A Vegetarian and One Who Worships at the Church of Bacon. This. This is my cross to bear in life people. And there is one way and I do mean ONE way only that this works. Toothpaste. Lots and lots of toothpaste after ever meal.

Now go ahead. Try to tell me you’ve got it better than us. Because we’re looking at 11 years come fall, and we haven’t killed each other yet.

That’s love. Or something like it.


  1. Just don't start supporting Newcastle United and you'll be fine …

  2. Aww! You and Poppa are so cute. Especially wrestling the couch out of the door while the child and dog run between your legs.. Oh, wait, that was ME!And TMI about the bumping pelvises, Momma. Somethings just don't need an explanation. Sincerely,Naughter Nora :]

  3. Dear NaughterAs long as you tell my child that one-time prom dates "coulda been daddy" TMI shall remain the name of the game. Much LoveMomma

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