Curse the Day Lalaloopsy Was 'Born'

It never fails. The big toys are packed away in the corner of the attic, the stocking stuffers are squirreled in a closet. And then she makes an announcement.

"I want X for Christmas."

Needless to say, attic and closet are positively brimming with L,M, Q and even Y. There may be an A in there, possibly an E . . . things are packed so tightly in there it's hard to tell anymore.

But alas there's no X.

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Nothing Like a Parent/Teacher Conference To Make You Feel Like a Kid Again

Listen up fellow marchers on the path toward wrinkles and grey hairs. I have discovered the fountain of youth. It really does exist!

All it takes is showing up for parent/teacher conference night at your kid's school, and you too can feel like you ought to be wearing short pants again.

I could blame the chairs, so tiny beside your body that you get an idea of how Gulliver felt around the Lilliputians. I half expected the seat to cave beneath my behind, four legs splaying outward, small plastic square meant for a child's hiney smashing to the floor in loud protest.

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Raise Your Kid in the Country (They'll Thank You Later)

It happens every time. There I am, traipsing through Manhattan, the sickly sweet scent of roasted chestnuts assaulting my nose, the pollution-clogged air making my country-fied eyes water. And I wonder, why the heck did I ever leave this place?

Why am I not raising a child in the heart of the action, where there's a cultural delight around every corner, and her palette could be stretched by introduction to a different type of cuisine every day of the week?

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The Most Freeing Election of My Life

If only election season were a season in the way that summer is. The long days and summer's sun moved with blink and you missed it kind of speed, while the drudgery of listening to politicians backbiting drags on.

But this year, I have discovered how to make the headache end early.

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The Real Internet Danger for Your Kids (Hint: It's Not the Pedophiles)

Several weeks have passed since a blogger with a complete disregard for the laws of the Internet hijacked a photo of me with my daughter and used it on a site that ripped me to shreds for something completely unrelated to my parenting. The photo itself is down; although he continued to ignore the illegality of his actions, repeated reminders that this was an innocent child's photo seemed to shame him into submission.

It was a move that scared even me, the proponent of the first amendment, the parent who has declared so many others over-sensitive to the fears of the Internet.

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My Vote: Up for Sale!

In the scheme of things, snow before Halloween isn't the worst thing. It chills the moldy pumpkins so they don't smell quite so ripe, and relatively warm sidewalks make for easy removal. There's even the notion that this may be the one thing that finally convinces the costume designers to finally craft outfits for kids who don't live in Florida!

I'm prepping my "snow boots" and "winter coat" plus costume pictures for them now.
Yes, the snow was an inconvenience.

But this weekday Halloween thing is really going to kill me.

The Monday Halloween may well be the worst for parents. First there's the obvious difficulty: e have to figure out how to complete all the regular after-school activities plus trick or treating. And we have to do them all before it gets too dark. Oh, right, and teachers would like our kids to show up for school the next morning bright and chipper rather than tired and suffering from a sugar hangover. I can't blame them. I wouldn't want to deal with my kid after too few hours of sleep and too many Snickers either.

But I digress.

Because it's one Monday.

But it means Halloween won't fall on a Friday or weekend for years to come.

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Winner! Melissa McCarthy's Children's Place Fave!

Snow-tober meant my kid got to put the owl hat favored by celeb mom crush Melissa McCarthy to good use. I can now officially tell you it keeps the ears warm during snowman-making and snowball-throwing.

And the better news is somebody else officially gets one of The Children's Place cute animal knits!

Giveaway winner time (unofficially) sponsored by the helpful generator at Random.org:

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