OK, I Give Up Already! I’m OLD!

Hello Kitty shoes
Can I be old with these on my feet?

The washing machine died — as appliances seem wont to do — just after Christmas. The next day, the kid came down with a stomach bug.

By the time the delivery men showed up with the new washer, I was ready to kiss their feet. I was like the actual kid was on Christmas morning just one week prior, anxiously anticipating that moment when I’d be able to wrest open the door of that giant metal box and load in a glorious pile of dirty laundry.

What can I say? These are the things that make me dance.

I’m officially a grown up.


It came at me when I least expected it. Sure, I bought a house awhile back (wait, could it be 10 years already?). And there’s that kid I gave birth to. But surely, I was still young, wasn’t I? I wore jeans and sneakers to the office! I ate M & Ms for breakfast and washed it down with Diet Pepsi.

I wasn’t getting old.

And then it happened.

I asked for a kitchen sink as a Christmas gift. No, really. Not “everything, including the kitchen sink” but an actual stainless steel tub which becomes useful once you attach a faucet.

I accepted that we would never spend a New Year’s Eve out on the town and began to struggle to make it to midnight.

I voiced my concern that meals were not balanced without a green vegetable.

I oohed and aahed over drawer pulls. Let me repeat that. Drawer pulls!

I started to re-think the wisdom of the 5-second rule.

The next thing you knew, a new washer started to sound exciting.

Think that’s bad? Just imagine what I’m like when I get an oil delivery.

When did you realize that you too were old?

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Comments

  1. Too funny. I asked for a steam mop and vaccuum for Christmas, and yesterday I declared that one of my top considerations in looking for a new job would be better health insurance. Old!

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