Puppy Destruction Log Number 212

teddy bear nose
Poor Nana …

I’m starting to wonder if I shouldn’t have an official list of things the puppy has destroyed. Just a little something I could keep to remind me in 10 or so years when I consider adopting another puppy that I really need to build a new clutter-free house to store him.

I’d post it on the side of the refrigerator, a pen attached via a string – like those petitions you see at your “local” every once in awhile – for making easy and frequent additions. Although, come to think of it, a pen hanging on a string? Have I learned nothing in the two and half months since we lost our minds and brought home a second dog? That’s puppy bait right there.

As is, well … everything?

Socks from the laundry of the sort I shudder to turn right-side out so they’ll actually get clean (side note: if you are still the sort who just chucks those suckers in the wash, please, for the love of everything, STOP!). Blankets. Pillows. Pajamas. Bathrobes.

We think we have him cured of munching on shoes, but the recycling bin is like a plastic-filled nirvana for my floppy-eared friend. Who knew a 5-year-old cup found in the corner of the playroom could bring such enjoyment to him? If only it stopped there.

It’s the stuffed animal destruction that will truly destroy me.

Explaining to a 7-year-old that a puppy cannot differentiate between his stuffed toys and her stuffed toys is like explaining to a puppy that some stuffed toys are not for his jaws.

Puggy the puppy went to that farm where stuffed doggies go to frolic and play for all eternity. Pony the half toy/half blanket (the things they make for kids these days!) has a head that dangles a wee bit more than it used to.

And I spent New Years Eve with needle and thread trying to give Nana the bear some semblance of a tail. And ears. And a face. There’s a reason I hire someone to tailor my clothes when there’s a problem; poor Nana looks like she’s done a few bouts with Ali. She has, ahem, character.

The puppy still sees her as lunch. Or at least a good middle of the afternoon when no one is looking snack. And don’t you dare leave Nana and a blanket out in the living room; he’ll be so delighted with his good fortune that he will proceed to tear through the living room at warp speed to celebrate, knocking anything that might belong on the coffee table to the floor. This applies double to any cups with liquid in them (left behind by the 7-year-old, of course).

Sigh.

This is where I mention he’s cute so you stop wondering why I haven’t sold myself to the zoo already to escape this mad house. Oh, and when you lie down on the couch, he cuddles up to you and falls asleep with his snout on your shoulder.

Yes, he knows exactly what he’s doing. He’s making us love him anyway.

What has YOUR dog destroyed? How long would it take to list it all?

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Comments

  1. Oh the joy of living with your very own brand new puppy. We rescued a bluetick pointer hound and named her Cookie. We figured she would keep our 10 year old (Candy) lab/pitbull company after surgery last year. Hmm? How quickly we forget! Puppies? They chew! Two telephones, my WII Game, my sneakers, a pair of shoes, my new boots, husbands slippers, 11 rolls of toilet paper, 6 rolls of paper towels. The list goes on and on.. I can only look at her, hold that cute face in my hand and sing "You made me Love you, I didnt want to do it". Perhaps the car ride sickness and puppy destruction will all go away in 2013? Oh wait, That is the number of things that she has already gotten into..I think we'll keep her..

Trackbacks

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