Most Americans wake up on Monday morning with one thought in their head, “Who invented Mondays, and why does he or she hate humanity so much.” Dog owners have a second thought. “Why is my dog so much smarter than I am?”
Dogs may not have opposable thumbs or human-sized brains (at least in relation to the size of their bodies), but on a Monday morning when your dog rises to greet the week with you, their thoughts are less “Mondaaaaaays,” and more “Feed me, feed me, feed me. Food, food, food, fooooooood.”
After they get you to do just that, plus a romp outside, guess what they’re going to do? Lie back down for a nice nap, likely on the couch that you swore to yourself you would never even let them on, only to give up about four weeks into dog “ownership.” While you’re toiling in a cubicle or outside in the hot sun, they’ll be sleeping off the hard work of gnawing through an entire rawhide bone. Still think we’re the smarter species?
Next time the words “dumb dog” come to mind, consider the following:
- Seventy percent of Americans admit they let their dog (or cat) sleep with them. And lest you think that’s mostly the cats and the itty bitty yappy dogs, another survey found 32 percent of big dogs are taking over their human’s mattress.
- On average, adult dogs spend 12 to 14 hours a day sleeping. Meanwhile, the CDC calls “lack of sleep” among American adults an actual public health problem.
- Americans spend more money on bathrooms than any other part of the house. Dogs can go to the bathroom anywhere … for nothing.
- According to scientists at the University in Japan, the “puppy dog eye” look really works. Humans’ oxytocin level shoots up when they stare into their dog’s eyes, making us happier … and more likely to do their bidding.
- Proof: More than three quarters of Americans who own a dog buy them treats.
- And: There are 80 million dogs living in someone’s home in the United States.
But hey, we’ve got those working thumbs.
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